Submission 230

Martina

Martina, it’s coming up to a year now since you did what you did. I want you to know that I don’t resent you for it and never have. More so myself if anything. While I now know why you did it, that doesn’t mean I understand it any more. The guilt has eased but is still lingering and I know that if you were here you’d tell me to stop being an idiot and stop thinking like that but it’s just one of those things I guess. I think this is something that I’m going to just have to learn to live with for now. There is not a day that goes by where I don’t think of you, what if anything I could’ve done or said differently or how different and better everything would be if you were here right now. These last few months to be blunt with you have been absolute hell and I miss you now more than ever. I hope you are safe happy and with nana and papa playing scopa under the pergola and having an amaro for me. I’ll join you one day I’m sure but until then I will have to wait. You really were right when saying life’s a bitch. I love you. Always. Vinnie