Submission 237

To my wee Scottish pal,

Somedays it feels like a million years ago that you passed away but other days it feels exactly like the actual 1889 days ago that you passed away and I can feel every moment of those 1889 days.
Every time something happens either good or bad I always want to call you or message you.
When mum got diagnosed with cancer again last year everything just felt completely impossible knowing that I'd have to navigate that without you but I know you were looking out for me and mum.
Sometimes I still have those moments where it takes my breath away knowing you're gone which is weird 5 years on because you'd think I'd be used to it by now but I don't think I ever will go used to you being gone, I don't think I want to get used to you being gone.
It's weird and horrible to think that this year on my birthday I'll be older then you'll of ever been but I get comfort knowing I'm doing this absolutely crazy, hard and mostly enjoyable life for the both of us
As always Rach stay safe and I hope there's loads of dogs and Friday night dinner is on repeat wherever you are