Submission 102
Dad,
I'm sorry. We never discussed emotions much. I wish we'd started opening up a long time ago.
I hope you know how loved you were... are.
Submission 101
Dear Snoop
It’s nearly 2 years since you’ve been gone and although it feels like just yesterday we were chatting about Christmas presents and what we’d get mum, it feels forever since I’ve heard your belly laugh and seen your cheeky little grin.
Submission 100
Dear Brian,
It will be one year since you went home to Heaven on that beautiful October day, a day you were done fighting your hardest battle, your mental health. One year.
Submission 99
To my dear brother
There is not a single hour that passes where I don’t think of you. The pain you were in and our desperation to “fix it” you had suffered for so long I struggle to even contemplate how that must of felt.
Submission 98
Dear Dan,
Not a day goes by where I don't think about you. Where I think about us. What we could have been, where we could have gone, what we could have done...together. But now I am alone.
Submission 97
To my husband,
Almost 4 years on my heart still aches from losing you.
Submission 96
To My Dad,
Almost one year has passed since I lost you. One year since I last spoke to you. Heard your voice. Had one last hug.
Submission 95
Dear Sister
It’s coming up to almost a year without you. Our first day of 2022 was the day you decided to choose to start a new life wherever you maybe, pain free.
Submission 94
To my sister H
Sometimes I have to ignore the indescribable blackness and sorrow that has has engulfed my world since you died. I think of you and just swallow that tight feeling in my throat. I push it away because it's too much to bare. I hug your nieces tightly and move through the day as best I can.
Submission 93
My Darling,
I am so very sorry for letting you down. I didn’t see the pain you were in. You ask for forgiveness but you don’t need to be forgiven, it is I who needs forgiveness. I have let you down.I was the one person who you should have been able to talk to. The one person you should have been able to be open with. But I failed, I failed to have the openness between us that would have let you be able to open up to me.I miss you every minute of everyday.
Submission 92
Adrian,
Just over a year since you left this earth. In truth you left us way before that but the real agony began then.I don’t know how to even begin to forgive you for leaving them and I have no more words.
Submission 91
Dear Moo,
If only you knew how much you were loved! If only you knew how much you would be missed!
Submission 90
Dear Dad,
The last time we spoke you knew you were going to be a Grandpa but you couldn’t hold on long enough to meet your beautiful granddaughter.
Submission 89
To my lovely brother,
Today marks the sixth month that you have been gone, and yet I still have not accepted your death. I am not coping as I should, and I am in fact lying to myself every single moment of the day, telling myself that you will come back one day…
Submission 88
Dear Dad,
I just wish you’d stayed.I know it’s impossible to rationalise a completely irrational act, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t spent the last 4 years trying.I have been strong and determined to make a good life for myself, to choose happiness always. It hasn’t been easy, there has been days I have wanted to give in, but just like my father I am stubborn and I will not.
Submission 87
To my Brother
Why? That was the question I couldn’t move past for years. I couldn’t understand, so I found explanation in blaming you and blaming myself.
Submission 86
My lovely Mum,
I’m sorry depression won.
Submission 85
Dear Loz,
I didn't think I'd make it through this past year. Losing you has blown a hole in our family. It has blown a hole in my heart. I don't think you could possibly have understood the devastation we feel that you are not here with us. And no matter how many times people tell me it wasn't my fault, I still feel so guilty. I'm your mum, how could I not? I still relive that last week, every moment, wishing with all my heart there was a way to change what happened.
Submission 84
To my brother,
In a few months I will be older in days than you got the chance to be, a strange realisation for a little sister.
Submission 83
To my darling Jack,
I miss you so much. Every second of every day despite it being 931 days since you left us all. I was so angry at first, I thought how could you do this and plunge everyone who loved and knew you into such heartache.